Hello anyone reading this blog post!
I have recently come to the realization that I really suck at this phenomena called 'relationships'. Not because I'm mean, or clingy, or anything like that. I simply can't seem to get one! (Perhaps this has to do with the slim pickings at school?)
The last relationship I was 2 years ago...and I'm 18 so I feel like I should be out there dating. But the doesn't seem to be the case. I think I'm too focused on school and work and friends, so I never really have the time to meet someone. But on top of that, I am painfully shy when it comes to boys that I think are attractive in public. I've recently started to smile at them and make flirty eye contact because I have decided that it's time to get out of my bubble (plus it's almost PROM time). Hopefully something will come of this new practice, my goal is to be able to walk up to a stranger that I find attractive and flirt with them...baby steps.
Now that I've established my goals for the future, I want to enlighten you with my train wreck of past dating.
1. I liked my neighbor for literally all the school year and when he found out he stopped talking to me (granted we were 14 so that was a while ago...but it starts here!)
2. I liked this guy for a year but I was too shy to speak with him because he was popular and a year older. (I really should have just talked to him, considering he knew who I was)
3. I had my first boyfriend at 15, he was 17 and things were pretty alright. I was just figuring things out and testing the waters. We dated for 3 months but only 2 officially. He broke up with me 3 days before my sixteenth birthday and we haven't talked since. We never kissed because I was too innocent and blind to take a hint...jeez that was a weird time!
4. I dated a guy when I went on an exchange. I thought he was H.A.W.T. I thought he was PERFECT. But then he was disgusting because I found out he was a pot-smoking, f*** boy, who made out with 28 girls in one night (which he told me on the first date...to impress me?). Great. I dated him anyway for fun, had my first kiss (which was gross) and cried a lot over him.
5. This guy in my class was the cutest thing ever. I really liked him and flirted with him A LOT. He wasn't much into school so he would just sit with me and chat while I did my work (how romantic?). When my school's semi-formal dance was coming up I frequently asked and bugged him to go because I figured he would take the hint. His friend did. He asked if we were "gonna kiss already?" and if we were "going to semi together?" to which my guy said yes. I was like, "What? No! You're not even going and it's tonight!" I said that rather loudly by accident, the whole class heard, and his face went bright red. It ended there. #OOPS
6. I was 17. This boy captured my attention. He was a flirt but especially flirty with me and so I fell for him hard. This shit is just too annoying to talk about in detail. Honest. I'm over him...mostly...but I still haven't fully moved on. And no, we didn't kiss, or anything but I felt like we had a fair share of chemistry. He was a F*** Boy and I didn't find that out until it was a little late...teehee :)
Now, I'm 18 and I will be going to university next year, and with my track record (6 boys, in 4 years, plus a few more that aren't worth mentioning) I will find someone to flirt with. Hopefully it'll go better than the past ones, I mean its not a very high bar to clear.
Here's what I want to do:
I would very much like to meet a guy who RESPECTS me. That's it. I'm DONE, D, O, N, E, DONE with f*** boys. Until then I do me :)
Thank you very much for reading,
Comment if you've had similar experiences to mine!
Until next time,